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It was as if the water was trying to tempt me getting closer and closer to succeeding.Eventually I decided I’d just do it. I would just do it! So, before I could give myself time to think I impulsively and enthusiastically took off all my clothes and carelessly flung them aside and I ran swiftly into the water.It felt so fresh and icy. So very cold and yet extremely satisfying. I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t comprehend what I was doing. I never did anything like this. I was too much of a coward and a prude and now I was in a lake completely naked. It felt so good. I couldn’t stop smiling.I couldn’t believe I was brave enough to do this. I giggled nervously and then I gleefully began to swim.It was an amazing feeling, the water flowing over my exposed skin, I felt so free and relaxed and I was so happily cherishing every moment of this incredible experience. It was so fantastic.After an hour I got out of the lake. I walked over to where my clothes were and to my absolute horror and. It felt good to be loved, and I knew that in a big sister way, Janie loved me. I walked in and looked around at all the boxes asking her if I could help her."Of course!" she happily replied.Helping her unpack, I kept trying to figure out how to move the conversation to where I needed it to go. I was there because I needed help, and I didn't have anyone else in the world to understand what I was about to ask. Understand? Today, looking back at that time of my life, I didn't have anyone that would want to help me, much less understand the help that I needed from her.The day moved on, and we finally got her tiny one-bedroom apartment unpacked. We would walk to the local pizza place as I listened to her go on about her daily dramas. After picking up a pizza, we headed back to her apartment."So come on, spill it," she would say. Janie always seemed to know when something was up with me."I met someone," I blurted out."I knew it!" she said as she gave me that big wonderful smile of hers..
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